Well, damn it.
I had a post all typed out, and my dad's damnass computer crashed. Fuckety.
I was using it because Goat broke Brittney's computer, so she was over here working on her Hamlet essay on my computer.
All I wanted to do was update my 'blog. But no. Too much to ask, apparently.
*sigh*
Anyhoo.
So what I said in my original post: I'm blah.
Not discontent, not unhappy, just blah. Almost like contentedness, but with a slightly negative tint. *sigh* Like the world is so dramatic and therefore mimetic, except it's not lifelike at all, just flat. Grey.
Brittney does make me happy, though. Very happy. Even when she has a paper to write, so I have to tell her to write the paper, and she writes the paper, and so we can't just make the hell out all night. She makes me smile.
Also, I'm writing. The fact that I'm writing means that I still love the world.
I think my pseudo-depression thing is based in a theory I'm still refining. Or maybe it's that my theory is based in the pseudo-depression.
Theory: humanity exists as a cobbling-together of the various emotional shrapnel from our own inflictions. I'm working on a play about it. Three scenes of robed, bearded men walking aorund in a head-high pool of fog.
Very much parallel to the book I read in its entirety the night before last: Everything Is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer. I highly recommend the book.
*sigh* Maybe it's just hormonal.
Saturnalia is tomorrow. That's happy. Two hours of pizza, Gladiator, and video games in the name of Latin Club.
Sunday is the church concert. That should be fun, assuming that I can hit my notes.
At the rehearsal last night, I utterly butchered everything because the monitor speaker was causing feedback, so we had it off. Yuck. So bad. So very bad.
And I just had a weird conversation with Carmen. She's eerily like me. Except more dramatic, if that be possible.
Perhaps just more honest. I think things and am afraid to say them, lest I validate my fears. She just goes ahead and vocalises the same thoughts.
Man, I'm weary all of a sudden. I think I shall sleep.
Goodnight.
Cooper [22:57]
Man, Blogger's fucky.
I didn't post last night; too busy. May post tonight.
But I've started writing again! It's been about a month and a half or maybe two months since I really wrote last.
College apps and depressing social scene/love life have been interfering with writing.
But Cooper appears to be all better now. And he has lots of news. Which he will share tonight.
No time for a real post, but I actually found another EJ Fischer: http://www.steungroep.nl/archief/kranten/find20020613.txt
I have much to post tonight.
*smile*
Cooper [11:41]
