I think my 'blog is possessed. So if you can, please leave a comment on this post as to whether or not you see a background image of a cat standing on a windowsill.
The exorcist thanks you.
Cooper [15:52]
I also found out Friday that Carmen went to Keystone School in middle school and elementary school. She found out that I went to Keystone School in third grade.
And that I am, indeed, the mysterious and fabled window-pusher.
You see, in third grade, another little boy had it out for me. One day, he comes barrelling down the aisle between the desks. I'm standing at the end of the aisle with my back to a window. He apparently, erm, really wants to go that way, so I decide to be kind and step out of his way. He blows past me. I give him a friendly bit of assistance on the back, and he goes right through the window onto the balcony.
Now, over the years this story has grown to the point that I pushed him all the way from the second floor, that I had a psychotic episode, that I was expelled, that he died, &c., and it has taken all of the imaginable twists a rumour can take.
Carmen is two years younger than I; she remembers clearly going to the window where it happened her second grade year (the year after it happened) and being shown the spot with some degree of eerieness by a third-grader. She had assumed all this time that the incident had been made up.
Apparently this little story is very famous at the school. At parties where there are girls from Keystone present, Cooper is quite the hot item. I've been told I'm 'mythical'. Mrs. LeStrange, whose son was a sophomore at the time, knew about it, only she did not know I was the child involved. Laura's brother, who went to Keystone, had also heard of the incident. This all surprises me, as I had forgotten it happened until about six months ago.
Small world.
Cooper [15:28]
Last night, I saw Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets with April, Nikki, Julia, Oisin, Chaly, Adam, Laura, Hamilton, Christian, and Ashley. It was a surprisingly good film. Especailly because Julia and I discovered that the word 'masutrbating' could be inserted into the dialogue very easily at a number of places, such as:
Harry: Can you tell me about it?
Julia: . . . masturbating?
The Book: No.
Cooper: But I can show you.
The Book: But I can show you.
(Cooper scores psychic points for that one.)
and
Guilderoy: I want you to get where you can all see me. . .
Julia: . . . masturbating. . .
Guilderoy:. . . hear me. . .
Cooper: . . .masturbating. . .
and
The Big Spider: They do not kill Hagrid by my command, but I cannot deny my sons and daughters
Cooper: . . . masturbating. . .
The Big Spider: . . .when it so easily wanders in.
April was going to kill me for talking during the movie, but hell, it really improved it.
Then I dropped Ashley off at her house and went to Brittney's, as her brother was having a party.
That was fairly fun, as Brittney and I just sort of went to her room and made out, then when we were done came out and watched the way-too-stoned-and-drunk partygoers try to play Super Smash Brothers.
Brittney (in her cute, formal little I'm-being-formal-and-cute voice): Andrew Cooper, will you go steady with me?
Cooper: Yes I will.
*smile*
Cooper [10:34]
Oh, and one other cool thing that happened today:
I got a fortune cookie containing a fortune which read: You have inexhaustible wisdom and power.
*grin*
Cooper [21:26]
Goddamn.
I've just come from cleaning my wounds.
You see, after school I was chilling with Paige and April. April and I were joking about how funny it would be if Dallas Moore (an administrator at school) were, erm, sexually attracted to Paige. We got a tad graphic, and Paige just lost it.
First she bit me, harder than I've ever been bitten. Didn't quite draw blood.
Then, she took off her heel and started to beat me with it. A fairly pointy heel at that. I'd been lying with my head on April's lap, so I was in no position to defend myself. I did manage to curl up into a ball, protecting my head and my torso. That left my arms and my back exposed, and they took a sound beating. I was bleeding quite a little bit.
Paige then ran to her car and drove out of the parking lot wildly. April helped me up, and I went to my car. I had a tough time driving home, as I couldn't really use my left arm and I kept almost passing out.
I managed to make it to my garage, where I passed out from the pain and just sat there for 15 minutes until I came to.
I'm really glad for the fact that I thought to go into the fœtal position, because otherwise I'd be in the hospital right now.
My parents didn't like this at all, suggesting variously to file legal actions against Paige and her parents, to get her tested for rabies, and the like.
*sigh*
On the plus side, I think Brittney and I are working out very nicely. I very much like her, and we keep getting closer and closer to something. This excites and scares me. I'm just being übercautious, because I don't want to hurt anyone (Nikki, Carmen) any more than I have to--which will likely be a lot, and I'm feeling bad about that.
Ben says to just go for it, and fuck the circumstances. Increasingly I'm coming around to that point of view.
Speaking of Ben: last night I was at Jim's doing homework with Sunil. Heh. He went there for like six or seven hours ostensibly to do homework, but in reality to work on getting the attention, phone number, and whatever else he could of Julianna, a waitress there. Julianna is Ben's friend.
The only problem with this: Julianna was entirely flirting with me the whole time I was there, and she didn't talk to Sunil so much before I got there or after I left. Well, he did get her to open up a little after I left, but still not all to his satisfaction. So he's kind of sad/mad about that. This is compounded by the fact that she kept asking about how Ben was doing and reminding me to tell him to call her.
Yeah, this was bad for Sunil.
I'm going to go be sore someplace now. Hopefully this aching with go away soon. I don't know. I don't really expect it to. But a man can dream.
Cooper [20:17]
All right, as promised:
Friday night, Sunil, Erika, Dave, and I went to see I Spy. It's a wonderful movie. Go see it. Quite humorous.
Saturday morning, I went to the UIL meet at Brackenridge. Took 8th in Science and 5th in Spelling. Not too bad, for having been called that morning to participate. I saw Krystal, the exgirlfriend with the weird not-talking-to-me-for-six-months-after-the-break-up thing. She seemed kind of just the same as always, a little wiser, and whatnot, but this is what she posted on blog of hers about me: "I saw Cooper at UIL academic meet yesterday. He's doing alright, and has gotten alot better looking, and Leslie now has a slight crush on him." Funkay. To which Shannon (the girlfriend after that) replied:
"1) How can Barrel-maker get better looking? I already thought he was there?
2) Who's Leslie... wait, she's the Marshall me, right?
3) I've met someone up here who's *just* like Coopster, btw. His names Corey Renall and we keep running into each other - it's quite creepy, as he goes to a completely different school in a completely different part of town, but that's what you get when you become a political activist!! But he even looks a bit like Cooper. Corey's voice is slightly higher and he speaks more quickly, but aside from that (and Corey doesn't play saxophone that I know of), they're alike. I'm proud to say, however, that I am officially more exuberant and energetic than Corey, though!! Whhhoooo-hoooooo!!! (It's been an ambition of mine for a while, now...)"
From there, I went to Pat Hammond's house. Pat Hammond is a delightfully artsy lady I'm being paid $15/hr. by to teach her computer skills. Then I was going to go with Erika to Fame, but that didn't end up working out. So Erika, Sunil, and I went to Malibu Castle and raced go-carts. That was fun.
Then Erika left for a party (or something) so Sunil and I went over to Sarah Gonzales' house and chilled with her and Josh Leal at the local elementary school. We had a taco picnic at midnight.
My parents being out of town for the weekend, Sunil and I decided to make a little mischief. We went to my house, chilled there for a little bit, went down into Salado Creek to boff (that's fight with foam-padded swords), then went to my elementary school to boff, then went to Jims for a little while.
After Jim's (this is 4.00 Sunday) we went to Paige's house. We sneaked around back of her house to her room windows, so as to knock and wake her up, but to no avail as she was not home. I wanted to wake her dad up and hang out with him (he'd have enjoyed it; he's a spaz) but Sunil wanted to move along. So we went to Ben's house.
Woke him up. Harassed him some, then as we pulled away I aimed my brights right in his window.
Later Sunday morning, Ben came online, and this is what followed:
Ben: dude
Ben: i love you
Ben: lol
Ben: that was so awesome
Cooper: hm?
Ben: this morning when you came to my house
Cooper: hm?
Ben: you and sunil
Ben: you came at like, 4 in the morning
Ben: remember?
Cooper: um dude
Cooper: whatmthe hell
Ben: no! that was not a dream!
Ben: no way in hell that was a dream!
Ben: that was no!
Ben: not a dream!
Ben: i remember everything!
Cooper: what
Cooper: jesus dude, you think my parents'd let me out at four in the morning
Cooper: what the hell are you talking about?
Ben: you said you went to jims and acted like a gay couple. you went by paiges house but she wasn't there
Ben: you asked if i wanted to spend the remainder of the night at your house
Ben: i said my mom wouldn't let me
Ben: dude
Ben: please tell me you're just fucking around
Cooper: jesus, man
Ben: otherwise i think i'm gonna go insane
Cooper: there's no way in hell I could get out at four in the morning
Ben: no.....you were there....i know you were....
Cooper: and what the hell, with Sunil?
Ben: he said "i know where you live"
Ben: and you said
Ben: "yeah, i've known where he lived for quite sometime now"
Ben: dude...
Ben: no..
Ben: it was real
Cooper: you have some damnass detailed dreams, g
Cooper: besides, dude, I'm fucking afraid of Mike
Cooper: motherfucker probably'd shoot my ass
Ben: ......no
Ben: ...no way.....
Ben: it was....a dream..
Cooper: jesus fuckin christ
Ben: it was so real!
Ben: you don't understand it was REAL!
Cooper: *shakes head*
Cooper: goddamn dude
Ben: no....
Cooper: all I did last night was go to Sarah Gonzales's and mope about how my bitch left me
Ben: i'm going to go take a LONG, COLD SHOWER
Ben: i'm going insane cooper.....
Ben: i'm seeing things now...
Cooper: hey, man, relax
Ben: i've been hearing them for like, the past week
Ben: and now i'm hallucinating...
Cooper: it was just a dream dogg
Ben: no...you don't understand....to me it was real
Ben: i because i went back to sleep
Ben: and woke up this morning
Ben: and was still laughing about it
Cooper: aight, so it was a really crazyass dream
Ben: no...i need to make an appointment with my psycologist.....
Ben: something's seriously wrong with me
Cooper: calm down, man
Ben: no i'm going insane cooper
Ben: i think i'm going to cry
Cooper: *hug*
Cooper: you haven't been *makes toking motion* have you?
Ben: no! no i'm clean!
Cooper: just chill out, man
Cooper: I remember in third grade
Ben: you don't know how real it was......
Cooper: I didn't take a bath for like a month 'cause I saw this episode of X-Files
Cooper: and I had really ass-scary dreams
Ben: no...cooper.....
Ben: god.....
Ben: i even remember the car turning on as you drove away! and the headlights!
Ben: sunil asked if someone was gonna come out and shoot you
Ben: and i said no but my mom was getting up and she heard you
Ben: and you guys left
Ben: and then you said "hey, let's go to brittney's house"
Ben: and sunil said "hell no!"
Cooper: hmph/
Cooper: why the hell would I go to Brittney's house?
Ben: i don't know!
Ben: sunil was the one that was opposed to the idea
Ben: he said i should tell my mom i could leave on unep business
Ben: cooper, if you're fucking with me, please tell me
Ben: this is really serious
Cooper: heh, now that's funny. UNEP.
Ben: please.....cooper....if you're fucking with me it's ok, i don't care, but please just tell me....
Cooper: maybe you need to take a break from MUN, dude
Cooper: *hug*
Cooper: calm down man
Ben: no......
Ben: cooper if you're kidding, please tell me
Cooper: *big hug*
Ben: are you kidding? cooper?
Cooper: take a chill man
Ben: but are you kidding?
Cooper: Im straight, man
Cooper: I don't think it's that serious.
Ben: yes it is!
Ben: it was so real!
Ben: Sunils online
Cooper: dude, tell him about this dream craziness
Ben: i am
Ben: i'm crying.....
Cooper: *big hug*
Cooper:"Sunil: this is mean. we are sooo going to hell. we got to tell him."
Ben: ..........
Cooper: *smile*
Ben: LOL
Ben: whoooooo
Cooper: *smile*
Ben: you are crazy man
Ben: next time
Ben: can i be in on it?
Ben: i mean go with you
Cooper: you know, if Sunil hadn't been so much of a wuss, we'd totally have led you on
Cooper: and then gone to your house tonight
Cooper: how much would that have fucked you up, eh?
Ben: ALOT!
Ben: can i hang out with you guys today?
Cooper: yeah, sure
Cooper: whom shall we hit tonight?
Ben: awesomeness
So then Sunday afternoon I went over to Brittney's (Josh's sister) house and made entirely out. To Return of the Pink Panther. God, I love Peter Sellers. That night, Ben and I went to Jim's to wait for Sunil. I wore in a Darth Vader helmet; he a stormtrooper helmet. The waitstaff loved it.
We then drove down Wurzbach Parkway with Ben's pseudo-girl in the back and Ben hanging out of my sunroof with the stormtrooper helmet on, waving like a beauty queen, all the way to Laura's house. Her brother answered the door, and was strangely not at all surprised that we were wearing Star Wars masks. Laura took a moment to recognise us, then chilled with us for a while.
We went back to Jim's.
Except then Sunil came in wearing a Darth Maul mask. One of the waitresses (who looks like Oisin's mom) came over and told Sunil that it's against the rules to wear a mask into a business, for fear of stickups. We apologised profusely.
Then at 1.30 Monday morning we went to Dave's house and boffed in his front lawn. His dad was afraid, almost called the cops, and knocked on Dave's door only to discover--Dave had a girl in there. Heh heh. Dave came out and told us off for a)scaring his dad b)getting him in trouble c)interfering with his mackage.
Then we went to my elementary school and boffed (all four of us--Ben, Sunil, Sarah, and I). A guy drove up, asked us 'just what the hell you're doing?' We explained. He left in a hurry.
We went back to Jim's to pick up Sunil's car, and the Mrs. Mabry lookalike was sitting there on the front porch of the restaurant, with like five or six cops. Sunil left in a hurry.
That was pretty much Sunday night/Monday morning. Monday during the day, I went to Mike's house. We rapped a bunch of TS Eliot. Fun stuff.
Then we hiked up Culebra Creek and got lost. That was fun, too. Followed by more fun: I went over to Brittney's house again, this time to 'listen to CDs'. Heh. Too bad I got some hickeys, though, which ended up giving me grief at school on Tuesday and today.
Tuesday night was the Black Box reading. That was fun. Mike and I totally rocked it down, burned it up, whatnot. And I sold one, a single, a solitary, a lone book.
. . .and Carmen told me she liked me. This I knew already, and she knew I knew, so she was just telling me to let me know she knew I knew. So as to be less awkward. You see, Carmen is really awesome. She's beautiful, funny, smart. So Cooper's life gets more complicated by the minute.
And now Josh seems to be trying to set Brittney and me up officially. He told me I'm officially 'approved as a mate for Brittney'. A distinction, apparently, I'm the only guy ever to receive.
Le sigh.
Cooper [01:16]
So we showed Mrs. LeStrange the act for Tuesday night.
We're playing four times. Four times. That's freaking great.
And I misplaced my damn shoes this morning, so I couldn't go to church. Which means I stood my uncle up. Not cool. But I did call his cell.
Much other info about this weekend so far, but not just now, because it's classified.
*smile*
Cooper [12:18]
